Pity or Compassion?

It is important that we examine whether we are coming from compassion or pity in responding to someone who is experiencing a challenge.

When we are experiencing pity, we are seeing others as helpless and ourselves as their savior or helper. This ignores the Christ nature within others. We must not lose track of the fact that this person is a spiritual being having a human experience, just as we are. They have the resources within them to face their challenge and overcome it.

Compassion is keeping our heart open to the pain of another and yet staying centered in truth.

I once heard someone use the term "idiot compassion" to describe how we may avoid conflict and try to protect our good image by being kind when we should say "no" in a situation. Perhaps we are not clear about our boundaries. Have you ever found yourself agreeing to do something for someone because you wanted to be seen as a "good person" even when your inner guidance told you that it was not yours to do?

When faced with a situation, ask for help in discerning what your response should be. Acknowledge the inner divinity of the person you see before you and open your heart to them. Sometimes compassion is just about listening to the person share their story. When we listen with compassion, we are being present to them in a way that supports them.

We can pray with them, affirming that they have the answers within them that they seek and that they have the strength and courage they need to do what needs to be done. Sometimes when we don't believe in ourselves, it helps to have others who believe in us.

So the next time you encounter someone who is experiencing a challenge, ask yourself--am I coming from pity or compassion? What is mine to do in this situation? 

Comments

[surjit]

Profound words..'Sometimes compassion is just about listening to the person share their story. When we listen with compassion, we are being present to them in a way that supports them'...A great message.
My best wishes.

[Naima]

This is absolutely well said. I never thought about it before. But it is true that many times what we need to let come out of ourselves is our compassion. Just like the Dalai Lama explains it compassion is one of these major keys in creating a better world...